All relationships seem to hit a plateau from time to time. It starts with all fireworks and excitement, and then we slowly get into a routine. At this point, we tend to start feeling like the spark has left. Those that love the calmness of this stage may love it. In contrast, others are constantly searching for the butterfly feeling again. Getting it back is up to you and knowing what makes your relationship unique. Start by looking at what others have tried to keep the spark alive.
Make your significant other a priority. It is typical once you feel stable to start not putting them first. You know they are there, and that is comforting. Then you begin to let work and other areas of your life take center stage. Stop this cycle. Your relationship should be your focus. You are putting out the spark by not giving it the time and effort it deserves. Think of the things you did when you first met and start doing those things again. When they see you making them a priority, it will be reciprocated, and the spark will light again.
Your partner is something new initially, and that is all that matters. The longer you are together, the fewer new things occur. Your date nights all start to blend into one. There are places you both love to eat. So, you end up going there again and again. Activities can follow this same pattern. It gets to the point where you are not as excited about date night anymore. Change this up. Pick something new for your date nights, or at least some of them. Do things that neither of you has done before. Eat outside of your comfort zone. It will bring more excitement back to the time you set aside for each other. Take turns planning surprise dates to make it even more climatic.
The spark dies with the communication does. Remember how excited you were when you saw you had a message from them. Keep that feeling going. Text throughout the day when you have a chance. Even if it is about nothing exciting, let them know your thoughts. When you are together in person, get rid of the devices for specific times. The most annoying spark-killing moment is talking to someone while they are staring at their phone. Make times that are just for you to communicate. Setting the time may seem odd, but it is needed to ensure that it happens with busy lives.
Show affection. It is hard to let the spark fade away if you are affectionate. Do not let a day go by that you do not kiss or hug. Without affection, it can be hard to keep the excitement alive. Find out what makes them feel the most loved, and don’t be stingy. Knowing you are wanted will help keep the relationship going.
The spark can live forever if you keep it fed!